Dad Update

No one knows the extent of my strength but me.  No one knows the depth of my weaknesses but me.  And when they collide, the world stops and hitches in my heart.  Just such a collision occurred yesterday.  While Mander and I visited my Dad, he cried.  Pretty much for the entire visit.  When I was a young mother I thought the worse thing in the world was when my child cried and I was unable to console them and unable to []

Books 7-9 Christopher Paolini Series

I re-read Eragon, Eldest and Brisingr so I could read “fresh” the fourth and final installment “Inheritance”.  It is a good series.  The ones I liked the most were Eragon and Inheritance.  Although I understand the middle two were needed to build the world Paolini envisioned, I felt it was almost too much. For whatever reason, we were made to wait such a long time for the fourth novel.  That forced me to re-read to remember the whole storyline.  That frustrated me []

Eggs and Benedict

So, over my morning fare of scrambles with turkey and spinach, I am reading up on the decision of Pope Benedict to resign from being Pontiff.  My first thought: That’s allowed?  Apparently, it is.  If we believe what the headlines say, even the Vatican was surprised.  He cited failing health in the tone of mind and body. Reading up on the events as they unfold, I am taken back to my office at Sutton in Valley Stream when Benedict took his place []

The Island of Misfits

Today was an exceptionally hard day.  Possibly the hardest day I have had since Daddy became sick. This person, this person who looks like my father – this is not Daddy.  Would Dad intentionally make me cry?  No.  No, I am sure he would not.  However, this person, the one who looks like my father – that is just what he did today. His surgery was on Dec 4th.  He remained in a coma-like condition until Dec 12th (even though sleep-inducing meds []

Eragon, Written by Christopher Paolini (Book 6 out of 100)

It had been a while since I read the first three books in this series.  The fourth, and final installment, has been out for a little while.  And, as I am diving back into reading and trying to knock out the stacks of what I already have before buying new pages, I decided to reread the first three books so I could catch up to where we are at the opening of number four.  As I reread the first book, I remembered []

Caregiver Blues

His eyes flutter open and dart around the room, looking for something familiar.  I am at his side.  “It’s ok Daddy, I’m right here.”  He looks at me with panic, then confusion and then sadness.  “Where am I?  Why have they not moved me to a regular room?  How long does it take?”  I tell him that the rooms on the main floor are filled, he is not moving, he has to stay put for the time being.  We are in the []

A Daughter’s Plea

Before you even read this post I want to ask you a question:  Do you smoke?  If the answer is yes, just quit dammit.  Just quit.  That is my plea to my Daddy.  That is my plea to all smokers.  Just quit.  And I get that it is not that easy.  God KNOWS I get that.  I am working through my Dad’s addiction to nicotine so PLEASE do not try to give me the same excuses.  I know it is hard to []

Shrimp Veracruzana (kind of)

So my Daddy just came home from a ten (10) day stay at the VA hospital due to being in AFib and having Congestive Heart Failure.  Our struggle will be healthy eating and the removing of cigarettes from his daily regimen.  I will be posting recipes as I come across them and try them out (along with pictures).  In my struggle to find good food that Dad finds tastes worthy, I hope to maybe change my own diet and lifestyle habits.  So, []

He said the only con he was running was to make me love him for the rest of my life. Little did he know, I was running the same con.

He lives his life like his ass is on fire.  Plain and simple.  If it has wheels, he has raced it…shifter carts, drag cars, bikes…  If it has wings, he has jumped from it…from the side, from the back, helicopters.  If it can attain high speeds he has crashed it…corvettes, too-small-canopies.  And if he has raced it or jumped from it or wrecked it – odds are he can rebuild it or repair it.  He is beyond mechanically inclined.  He volunteers to charge []

I told him I was broken and he responded, “Aren’t we all?”

***Disclaimer folks, this is a long one.  But, I’m the storyteller so I get to tell it in as many words as I want. Until last weekend there were two instances that ripped my heart in half.  The most traumatic moment of my life was when I had to tell my Daddy that Ma had died and then hearing his agony in the minutes that felt like centuries after.  The second happened in September 2011 when my daughter was rafting the Gauntlet []