Eight years ago Ma was in the hospital. I hugged her neck and told her I loved her. Had I known that that would be the last time I would ever be able to talk to her, I would have stayed longer and hugged harder. Holidays are especially hard and I busy myself as much as possible to keep from remembering that she is no longer here, that Dad is no longer here. I hate this day. I hate Jan 13th. I am sure I will eventually hate Oct 1st just as much.
Just a ramble.
Just a thought.
Just a heartache.
Thoughts and Ponderances 
Instead of eventually hating Oct 1st just as much, I hope that eventually this day, Jan 13th and Oct 1st become additional days upon which you smile and remember that even though they are no longer here, the time you got with them was full of love and laughter and ridiculously entertaining memories. That, while they may be gone now, the lives they lived with you make it impossible to not feel them with you always. I love you.