On the side of the carton: My Motivation

…have you seen it?  If so, please call….ME

Ugh.  No, seriously…U.G.H.!

This year should have been so different for me. I have a new tiny camper that I was supposed to be using with greater frequency.  I was supposed to be training for the Air Force Half (being run next week).  I should be reading any one of the dozens of books that I have picked up in the past several months.  I was working diligently on my #48in48 challenge (and enjoying the hell out of it).  I was supposed to…well, I was “supposed to” a lot of things.  Instead, I am in a constant state of blue, of exhaustion and of blah. A motivationless funk, so to speak.  I had surgery in June that turned out shitty (blog in the works for it).  Short end to it: I went in for an (almost) out-patient surgery and I woke up HOURS later with a tube down my throat and in my stomach to remove the blood and gunk.  Since then it is as if the wind has left my sails.  I lost a lot of blood. A lot.  I was told it would take forever to get my energy levels back up.  I have comfort-eaten myself into a stupor.  I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror this past weekend and found myself in tears.  I am not where I am “supposed to” be.

So, my mind is set now:

I am working on a schedule for blogs.  I have my little journal books everywhere with notes written on music, movies, TV, politics, etc – no loss for subjects.

I am helping move the last of Mander’s stuff tonight into her new apartment and tomorrow will be the jump off day for walking/running/exercising.

I am working on my #48’s list to see where I left off and where I can pick up.

I hope to get a camp trip in the first weekend in October.

I am running the second annual Bridge Day 5K Oct 21st.

So…things. I have things planned.  Fun things.  Hoping for inspiration.  For motivation.  For the drive that is missing.

 

Wish me luck and if you have a minute, send me motivation.  I need it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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